Friday, January 29, 2010

Contest Winners

Contest winners have been announced! Check out the Clown Punchers BOZOKAST page for episode 13 here, or check out the direct download for episode 13 here to hear the five winners announced (yes, I bumped up the number of winners because there were so many good entries). Anyone who won, please contact me or Helicity Boson in-game to receive your prize.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Contest Entries

First off, I want to spoil everyones hopes and dreams by saying that the winners will NOT be announced in this post. The winners will instead be announced on the next BOZOKAST, just as soon as I get in contact with Teister/Queb and get it recorded (hopefully soon if I'm not too lazy). I am however going to go through the entries and display them here since it is difficult to really get a single viewpoint on all the wonderful submissions via the comments page. Additional note before I get into things: Some of these images are not work safe. View at your own risk.

Without further adieu:


Submitted by Amonthia

Submitted by Jesse

Submitted by Ran Khanon

Submitted by Arrhidaeus

Submitted by Teister

Submitted by DrooshKa

Submitted by Alekseyev Karrde

Submitted by Zwyczajny Robol

Submitted By Jawmare

Submitted by El Lion

Submitted by Manasi

Submitted by Zwyczajny Robol

Submitted by Delishus

Submitted by Ragin Cajun

Submitted by Ragin Cajun

Submitted by Ragin Cajun

Submitted by Ragin Cajun

Submitted by Delishus

Submitted by Firemaster

Submitted by Firemaster

Submitted by Deltore Tricerk

Submitted by Metalkiss

Sepctre (sic) Is what you want him to be submitted by Deathmedic

spectre is a fucking jackass i painted it on a billboard in san diego
never been there before
he saved my marriage with the devil
he podded his ass in null sec
so i painted it on a napkin and uploaded it to flickr
but he lost the link what a dick
so I wrote this song and kicked his ass in my mind

spectre flew my mother to mars and jupiter
but she's had it better
I heard he ate a kipper with raw onions
it's a lie it was with pepper
he was on holiday in jita and ganked a velator
nothing more?
so i wrote this song and kicked his ass into my head

spectre is a gay is a homo is a lesbian he is what you want him to be
but not on me
don't give spectre you're isk you'll never see it again or will you?
he once took on chuck norris with a n00b laser
so i wrote this song and chuck crapped on his keyboard

spectre is my hero he has chin hair just like my brother
he once recorded a porno but couldn't fit his in camera
dig his chin hair girls!
he has more .......

Three different people submitted this same Tackfilm entry:

Bods submitted this entry of me singing the Pirates of the Carribean song:

Kobrakilla submitted this fantastic rap video about me:

Kyle submitted this weird shit:


There are simply too many entries in this category for it to be something I can organize legibly into a part of this blog post. Instead, I encourage everyone to go through the comments in the last post to see all the entries, follow the links and also check out this RSS feed that contains many of the blog posts related to the contest. Just as a taste, here are a bunch of the best:

Mynxee Writes a Poem and Wishes a Baby Upon Me

Swerte Posts on C&P About Me and PC

Star Defender Calls Me a Scammer

Callin Vandylx Retires Me

Cozmik Brown-noses and I Love Every Second Of It

Sage Plays The Star Wars Card

Perseus Is Sick Of Carebearing Bullshit Stories

Hallan Gives Me Exactly What I Asked For

Latro Offers Me His Rook (Sounds Kinky)

The Jaguar Says I'm Scamming (How Rude!)

Chacacha Sings Me A Song

Thorvik Says I'm The Best Pirate Ever

Conclusion For Now

You guys did a bang up job. You threw so much stuff at me that it took literally hours to go through it all and then compile it into a post. If anyone notices that I missed their picture or video or song or blog link, please drop a comment and let me know. I feel like it's definitely possible I may have missed or forgotten to add because of the amount of entries there was to sort through.

I will make a post here once the winners have been announced and the new BOZOKAST is up, hopefully within the next several days. See you then...

Monday, January 18, 2010

Yes, You Can Have My Stuff

Long story short, I am taking an indefinite break from Eve. I made quite a bit of money via scamming a few months ago and I feel that it would be wrong of me to let all of it sit unused and unappreciated on inactive accounts. I have given a few billion worth of ISK and items to another player to act as escrow for a contest that is going to run the next few days. The details are below:



Create anything that publicly expresses something about me. Anything. I don't care if it is a billboard in San Diego that calls me a fucking jackass. I don't care if it's an essay about how I have saved your marriage. I don't care if you draw a picture on a napkin and upload it to Flickr. Hell, you can even just write a haiku or a badass death metal song. All you have to do is create some sort of media about Spectre and then either post it or a link to it in the comments section of this blog post.

Please make sure to include your in-game Eve-Online character name in case you win a prize. I don't want to have to track down the winners in order to transfer/contract any prizes. Everyone is allowed to submit as many entries as they would like... there is no limit, but remember: QUALITY OVER QUANTITY.


Thursday, January 21st at midnight Eastern Standard Time (so Wednesday night is the last chance to submit). If my time conversion is right, this is 0500 Eve time (GMT) on Thursday morning.

Prizes *:

1st Place
1,000,000,000 ISK
Megathron Navy Issue with T2/Faction Fittings and Rigs

2nd Place
500,000,000 ISK
Megathron with T2 Fittings and Rigs

3rd Place
250,000,000 ISK
Curse and Zealot with T2 Fittings and Rigs

Random Jackpot
250,000,000 ISK
Harbinger and Myrmidon with T2 Fittings and Rigs

The three best entries will be chosen by me and awarded the prizes above for 1st, 2nd and 3rd place. In addition, one random person from all participants will be picked out of a hat and awarded the Random Jackpot.

Good luck!

* Spectre3353 reserves the right to award prizes of equal or lesser value if extenuating circumstances arise. All prizes are final and non-refundable. Maybe a dingo ate your baby.

Saturday, January 16, 2010


Who says that other MMO's aren't as hardcore as Eve?

Friday, January 15, 2010

Skill Update

Casiella asked something in the eve-bloggers channel last night that I thought was kind of an interesting question:
[03:06:20] Casiella Truza > Hm. Do I post too often?
An interesting question indeed. When is someone posting too often? Is there a such thing as blog spam? Does it offend your readers when you provide too much information? Too much entertainment? Too much fluff, not enough content? While everyone does it differently, I have always tried my best to avoid fluff posts or the publishing of anything that I don't think is worth reading. I try to keep my content narrowed down only to what is important, riveting and the type of classy stuff you might see in The New Yorker.

Upon inspecting CT's blog this morning, I noticed a new post about what skills he/she currently had trained with his/her character and I realized that I have never done such a post! A lot of pilots enjoy using EVEMon to track their skills and then generate charts and fancy pictures, so why not me? Here is mine:

The important thing to note first is that I have put an extraordinary amount of skill training time into some things and I didn't even quite realize it. Apparently my character is quite competent at the act of pleasuring a man using both his hands and his oral cavity. This is something that will probably become very useful when Walking In Stations finally gets deployed (although I guess "Walking" isn't the activity I will be doing in the station). Additionally, it seems as though I have quite a bit of SP invested into the telling of dead baby jokes. For example:
Q: How do you make a dead baby float?

A: Ten ounces root beer, two ounces dead baby.
I think I've still got a long way to go to round out my skills as my artistic skills still aren't quite up to par with other pilots. "Microsoft Paint IV" and "Adobe Photoshop Specialization I" are in the queue and I will be sure to update everyone when I have progressed that far.

Monday, January 11, 2010

Someone Hacked My WoW Account

A couple nights ago, my brother-in-law was over, trying to convince me to resubscribe to World of Warcraft so that we could play together. I placated him with some "maybe" and "possibly" answers while knowing in the back of my mind that there was no way I was going back to that piece of shit game until at least the next expansion. Out of curiosity, we looked up my level 80 Mage on the WoW Armory to see what phat purplez (industry term) I was wearing for gear. I didn't think it would even show up because my account had been inactive for nearly a year but sure enough, there she was. Upon further inspection, I realized that my talents had been completely changed to a full Frost build and there were new achievements that had been attained... TODAY! Flabbergasted, I attempted to log into only to realize that someone had added an authenticator key to my account and there was no way I could log in... had happened... I HAD BEEN HACKED!

I looked into the forums and found many other people with a similar issue. Chinese (or whatever nationality they are) farmers had stolen their accounts, used their highest level characters to farm and then sold off every item on all their characters to make gold. But how could this have happened to me? How could I have possibly had an account hacked? I haven't logged into in months and I hadn't logged into World of Warcraft in a year! Furthermore, how could I possibly have picked up a keylogger when I only view random porn sites a few times a day? Not to mention I usually only visit reputable ones with minimal bestiality and only a smidgen of midget footage? It was blowing my mind as to how this could have occurred.

I put my foot down and swore that this injustice would be rectified. I contacted Blizzard support and soon I had control of my account again. I checked the account status screen and realized that the farmers had just activated my Warcraft account a week ago with their own credit card and I now had nearly a month of free time thanks to their generosity. A month of free time... what is a man to do when he is offered free video games? What indeed...

This Will Spawn A Big Old
Glass Of Haterade


Friday, January 8, 2010


I try my best not to post about stuff that twenty-five other bloggers have already discussed in recent posts, but there is simply no way I can avoid this one:

The event started a couple of nights ago and in less than two days, the Hulkageddon killboard is already showing well over 500 ship kills and close to 600 if you include pods. Considering that this whole operation is intended to go on all week, there is the potential for well over one-thousand and maybe closer to two-thousand total kills on mining ships (as long as the miners don't finally get smart and dock up in highsec). I will be the first to admit that I never saw the enormous boost in popularity and attention that this second iteration of this event would bring. At best I assumed there would be a few hundred kills over the course of the week. The first Hulkageddon only lasted a day or two and only resulted in a little over 100 total kills. Only a few corporations were involved and there wasn't that much external attention from the rest of Eve-Online's community other than a single ISD report. Compare that to now when a massive number of mining ships are being ganked mostly in highsec and when the first page of the C&P forums looks like this:

Someone needs to tell Aintzane
that he's
ruining the pattern

Some of the best parts have been the hatemail and responses from the victims. Even in my short experience so far I have gotten to know the wonderful joy of really pissing off the gankee:
[01:48:29] Okseandra > You're dead
Tons of out of game responses have been made as well via the forums, comments sections of blogs and even whole blog posts themselves. The best of these being a couple posts from some gaming nuns who actually go as far as to compare Helicity Boson to Hitler. Yes, you heard that right. The mastermind of a ship ganking operation in a video game is somehow comparable to one of the most destructive and genocidal individuals ever to walk the earth. I don't know if it is absurd, an insult or a compliment.

If I looked that nasty, I would
probably resort to being a nun as well

Regardless of its outcome at this point, Hulkageddon has made an enormous impact upon the the Eve community and many thanks to Helicity for making it such a success. If somehow, you have not heard about it or taken part quite yet, get off your ass and go gank a miner. All it takes is a a couple cheap, insurable ships and the motivation and desire to cause destruction. Go do it. You know you want to. For the nuns.


Two pictures/links I wanted to add to this post:

(1) Hulkageddon killed my dog:

(2) Oh the humanity! Another Hulk down and a great screenshot to go with it:

Carry on.


It just gets better and better. I don't know who made this but it is pure gold:


Last update for Hulkageddon as it has now ended. Final stats according to Helicity Boson's blog:

Ships Destroyed:

1220 Exhumers

332 Barges

12 Orcas

240 capsules

ISK Destroyed:

278,865,104,560 ISK

That is 278 billion ISK destroyed according to the killboard. Very impressive and even the industrialists had some fun with it.