Friday, February 26, 2010

Keeping The Peace - ADF Operation Beta

The Spacelane Journal Reporter: Welcome back to our continuing special on the Amamake Defence Force, defenders of lowsec and the newest initiative from our friends at CONCORD. This is our second interview with ADF Commander Spectre, who gave us a great rundown of their first operation several weeks ago. Welcome back to the program, Commander!

Amamake Defence Force Spectre: Thanks.

TSJR: Can you tell us how things have gone since we last spoke after Operation Alpha?

Spectre: Certainly. After the severe tragedy of Operation Alpha, we decided to shore up all weak points, equip our officers more properly and put them through some very rigorous anti-violence training. CONCORD and the ADF have realized that it will take significant force and the best trained officers possible to make a dent in problem that is destroying our galaxy.

TSJR: That is wonderful to hear!

Spectre: I have some footage here of Operation Beta in which we patrolled the Old Man Star, Aeschee and Tama solar systems of low security space. Roll the tape please...

Narrator: At 0216 New Eden Standard Time, the ADF entered Aeschee local and began their operations by checking out a suspicious ship undocking from one of the stations:
[ 02:19:10 ] Spectre3353 > XgAdam, please leave this station, it is a restricted region.
[ 02:19:25 ] Spectre3353 > By order of the Amamake Defense Force, we request full compliance from all pilots in system.
[ 02:20:53 ] XgAdam > Spectre3353, please leave local chat. it is restricted to those with IQ's higher that a rusty spoon
[ 02:21:25 ] Spectre3353 > XgAdam, under CONCORD authority I can arrest you for insubordination if you continue to verbally assault an ADF officer. Please comply with our requests.
[ 02:21:49 ] Andrea Skye > Sir, it is an offence to talk to an ADF officer with such a tone, please cease from such activities or face the consequences
[ 02:22:03 ] RyanSnake > shut yo face son
[ 02:22:36 ] Golden Helmet > Sir, please refrain from any further verbal assaults, or else we may forcefully re-enact the Rodney King incident
[ 02:22:58 ] Andrea Skye > Your hostility has been noted and saved to our records.

[ 02:24:06 ] Spectre3353 > Sir, please pull your vehicle to the side of the station.
[ 02:24:08 ] Lachesis VII > Stop your ship and pulll over.
[ 02:24:17 ] Spectre3353 > Please remove your pod from the vehicle and display your license and vehicle registration.
[ 02:24:41 ] Spectre3353 > Control this is Car Bangarang, we have a 4-12, Phobos on the run.
[ 02:24:42 ] Spectre3353 > Please advise.
[ 02:24:43 ] XgAdam > O.o im already in my pod genius
[ 02:26:03 ] Drinoch > that's the wierdest fleet i've ever seen lol
Narrator: It was at this moment that a speeding Rupture was spotted flying by the station that the ADF was trying so hard to protect. Several officers were deployed to chase down and ticket the offender.
[ 02:27:03 ] killer chick > omg its the cops
[ 02:27:26 ] Spectre3353 > Killer Chick please refrain from all violent activities in this lowsec system. It has been declared highsec for the time being.
[ 02:27:28 ] killer chick > /emote resists arrest
[ 02:27:35 ] Spectre3353 > HES GETTING AWAY
[ 02:27:39 ] Andrea Skye > CODE 9
[ 02:27:40 ] Spectre3353 > HE PUNCHED ME IN MY BREAST
[ 02:27:47 ] killer chick > you will never catch me
[ 02:27:50 ] Apoctasy > IN PURSUIT
[ 02:27:59 ] Golden Helmet > BRING IN THE K-9 UNITS
[ 02:28:00 ] Vaurion Infara > oh snap, the fuzz
[ 02:28:08 ] killer chick > /emote pulls over
[ 02:28:19 ] Golden Helmet > GET OUT OF THE CRUISER
[ 02:28:19 ] Spectre3353 > Sir please put your hands on the dash
[ 02:28:22 ] Golden Helmet > HANDS BEHIND YOUR BACK
[ 02:28:22 ] Nashh Kadavr > breathalize him!
[ 02:28:47 ] Spectre3353 > Thank you sir
[ 02:28:48 ] Golden Helmet > CUFF HIM, BOYS
[ 02:28:50 ] killer chick > /emote runs
[ 02:28:50 ] Andrea Skye > hes getting away on foot!
[ 02:28:53 ] Spectre3353 > /emote does a search of the Rupture
[ 02:28:57 ] Golden Helmet > DAMMIT
[ 02:29:04 ] Spectre3353 > /emote finds a giant bag of marijuana.
[ 02:29:10 ] Spectre3353 > SIR, IS THIS MEDICINAL?
[ 02:29:17 ] killer chick > uh
[ 02:29:22 ] killer chick > yes sir
[ 02:29:23 ] Lachesis VII > /emote finds a suitcase full of sex toys
[ 02:29:25 ] Spectre3353 > I'm sorry but we are going to have to impound your ship.
[ 02:29:29 ] Spectre3353 > You are going to the slammer.
[ 02:29:36 ] 0mnibeing > Hello fat chick
[ 02:29:42 ] killer chick > please don't officer, its all i got
[ 02:29:44 ] Lachesis VII > you know these are illegal in empire spce?
[ 02:30:17 ] killer chick > i didnt know it was illegal
[ 02:30:20 ] killer chick > honest
Narrator: Fortunately the offender did finally comply with ADF demands and the ship was impounded for several infractions by its owner.

Narrator: After a rousing success to start operations, the ADF employed one of their highly skilled probe mechanics to track down a Dominix in deep space that appeared to be engaging in some sort of violent combat. Soon the fleet had entered his grid and began to employ Electronic Countermeasures against all offending parties.
[ 02:35:30 ] Spectre3353 > YOU IN THE DOMINIX
[ 02:35:58 ] Vaurion Infara > better taze him, dat nigga crazy
[ 02:36:01 ] Spectre3353 > Halt! In conjunction with The Amamake Peace Accord of 58177 we, the Amamake Defense Force, demand that you cease your aggressions and retreat from the field of battle immediately!
[ 02:36:01 ] Golden Helmet > ATTENTION DOMINIX PILOT
[ 02:36:06 ] Golden Helmet > VIGILANTIISM IS NOT APPRECIATED
[ 02:36:10 ] Golden Helmet > PLEASE LEAVE THE VICINITY
[ 02:36:40 ] Andrea Skye > leave it to the professionals

Narrator: But wait! The ADF suddenly realized that this Dominix was on their side as he was destroying rogue drones for the Gallente Federation! Oh dear!
[ 02:37:27 ] Spectre3353 > APOLOGIES CITIZEN
[ 02:37:30 ] Spectre3353 > WE DID NOT REALIZE
[ 02:37:34 ] Vaurion Infara > the hell man
[ 02:37:38 ] Golden Helmet > OUR MISTAKE, SORRY
[ 02:37:38 ] Vaurion Infara > not cool
[ 02:37:43 ] Golden Helmet > Please don't file a complaint
[ 02:38:30 ] Vaurion Infara > damn po po... keepin a playa down...
[ 02:38:46 ] Mathias Ortez > you accidentally the whole thing?
[ 02:39:13 ] Tallon Greer > is 1700 m/s within the speed limit?
[ 02:39:43 ] Vaurion Infara > jeez... i had the last ship 1/2 popped too

Narrator: With their duties fulfilled in Aeschee, the Amamake Defence Force next set destination for the wild and dirty system of Tama. They were immediately greeted upon entering Tama local.
[ 03:12:42 ] Merin Ryskin > Oh, you people.
[ 03:12:42 ] flyy1 > fucking losers
[ 03:12:45 ] jackz01 > heed my call!!!!
[ 03:12:52 ] jackz01 > GET OUT OF MY SYSTEM
[ 03:13:03 ] Spectre3353 > Control - I have a 5712 Honda Rupture here with a tailight out. License plate 1726-A8FF-129100-FEA-1
[ 03:13:07 ] Spectre3353 > Roger roger.
[ 03:13:09 ] Merin Ryskin > So how many Falcons did you bring this time?

[ 03:15:57 ] Gorgoth24 > Yall find them adn i will kill them X)
[ 03:15:57 ] Apoctasy > WE ARE A PEACEFUL FORCE
[ 03:15:58 ] rm9403 > i will
[ 03:15:58 ] jackz01 > vs these fags
[ 03:16:05 ] Spectre3353 > Sir assaulting an officer is a VERY serious offence. You should think before you suggest such things.
[ 03:16:11 ] jackz01 > lets all kill
[ 03:16:13 ] jackz01 > the officer
[ 03:16:18 ] jackz01 > then crap on his dead body
[ 03:16:26 ] Wohenmang > Sir, please refrain from speaking abrassively towards the Amamake Defence Force we are here for YOU! we are making this system a safe haven for miners and industrialists alike!
[ 03:16:32 ] jackz01 > i doing it
[ 03:16:53 ] Spectre3353 > Yes Officer Nash
[ 03:17:04 ] Spectre3353 > Crapping upon corpses is against order 56-1.B in the ADF rulebook
Narrator: With the bulk of their forces gathered in an asteroid belt, keeping an eye on the locals, a single Myrmidon battlecruiser arrived and began engaging with a rogue Rupture. The ADF would not stand for such disruptions and they responded quickly and with full force.

[ 03:20:15 ] Golden Helmet > DO NOT RESIST ARREST
[ 03:20:16 ] Lachesis VII > EJECT FROM YOUR SHIP
[ 03:20:16 ] L4zor R0B0T > YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO EJECT
[ 03:20:20 ] jackz01 > LOL
[ 03:20:27 ] rm9403 > who th f are u i sware i will f*** u uo
[ 03:20:29 ] rm9403 > up*
[ 03:20:29 ] jackz01 > pyton carel
[ 03:20:33 ] jackz01 > they are noobs

Narrator: The ADF watched helplessly as the Rupture continued to pummel the Myrmidon and soon the battlecruiser was destroyed in a furious explosion. As the engagement ended, the hostile locals made their move as a large, dangerous fleet began arriving at the belt.
[ 03:23:09 ] L4zor R0B0T > YOU SIR IN THE HURRICANE
[ 03:23:51 ] Spectre3353 > SHOTS FIRED
[ 03:23:52 ] Spectre3353 > SHOTS FIRED
[ 03:23:54 ] Spectre3353 > OFFICER IS DOWN
[ 03:23:56 ] rm9403 > pvpers f*** the fag-o-lice
[ 03:23:57 ] Nashh Kadavr > OFFICER DOWN!!!
[ 03:23:59 ] Spectre3353 > WE NEED BACKUP OH MY GOD NO
[ 03:24:01 ] Spectre3353 > HELP PLEASE HELP
[ 03:24:03 ] jackz01 > we are all owning them
[ 03:24:22 ] rm9403 > i will help
[ 03:24:32 ] jackz01 > they are all jamemers
[ 03:24:34 ] jackz01 > jammers
[ 03:24:37 ] jackz01 > thats all they are
[ 03:24:39 ] rm9403 > lol
[ 03:24:39 ] UberNero > OFFICER NEEDS ASSISTANCE
[ 03:24:43 ] Gorgoth24 > Lol
[ 03:24:45 ] Wizardus > OMG!
[ 03:24:46 ] jackz01 > griffins
[ 03:24:48 ] Gorgoth24 > Is that yall in belt 1?
[ 03:24:49 ] jackz01 > scorpions
[ 03:24:50 ] Wizardus > I's a BB marathon!!
[ 03:24:52 ] Golden Helmet > OFFICER DOWN
[ 03:25:27 ] Apoctasy > WE HAVE MULTIPLE OFFICERS DOWN
[ 03:25:27 ] Spectre3353 > Again it has happened
[ 03:25:32 ] rm9403 > yeah gtfo out
[ 03:25:34 ] Spectre3353 > our attempts at peace have turned into a massacre
[ 03:25:45 ] jackz01 > we take this for pvppers!~!!!!!!!!
[ 03:25:46 ] Spectre3353 > When will New Eden learn to be peaceful?
[ 03:25:46 ] rm9403 > thats right bitch
Narrator: The ADF fought valiantly and bravely to keep their attacks at bay without causing any harm in return but this was another fight that simply could not be won. After several officer casualties, the police force had no choice but to limp away and regroup, defeated.

[ 03:28:57 ] jackz01 > police suck
The feed slowly fades to black as several ADF Blackbirds fly off into the distance, fire and smoke cascading from their ravaged hulls.

TSJR: That was quite intense, Commander. What was the final result of the second ADF operation?

Spectre: *sighs* Not good. This job sucks. I quit.


EDITOR'S NOTE - Some chatlogs posted here were edited for content. Nothing said was modified but some lines of conversation were removed to keep chatlogs from becoming unreadable blobs of spam. Thanks for your understanding and please continue to read the Spacelane Journal!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

You're All A Bunch Of Whiny Fucking Bitches

It seems like there is quite a blob of blogs about Eve these days. I think it's great that technology and the meta-gaming aspect of Eve and the web have allowed the Eve blogging community to thrive and grow over the past couple of years. Unfortunately, it seems like a large number of people are starting to take silly fun writings about a video game way too seriously. At some point, several members of this community stopped being concerned with quality or entertaining or self-fulfilling writing and began being more concerned with their internet traffic, number of subscribers, twitter discussions, blog-pack recognition, in-game shout outs, blah, blah, blah. It seems to have come to even more of a head when CrazyKinux, self proclaimed "Blog Father" (and I stress the self-proclaimed part) decided to refactor and revamp his list of blogs that are displayed on his site and also linked to via Capsuleer.

A recap of last episode on "As The Eve-Bloggers Whinefest Turns":

- CrazyKinux states intentions to revamp blog pack.

- Roc Wielier responds.

- Kirith Kodachi responds.

- Hallan Turrek begs for support from his readers to vote for his blog.

- Alexia Morgan/Black Claw whines like a whiner.

- CrazyKinux redefines his revamp due to the backlash.

I feel like I missed something somewhere. Are we getting something out of being linked from the blog pack and getting an extra dozen visits a day? Is someone making money off of their blog and somehow this tiny bit of extra traffic makes or breaks whether or not you can buy a boiled egg for dinner tonight? If so, fucking let me in on the secret because I don't make shit off of this blog. I write it because I enjoy writing it. Maybe some of you have forgotten that that should be the main reason you are posting at all. If you really are concerned with increasing your video-game, internet-spaceships, blog readership then perhaps you should do it via some self-promotion and by posting quality writings, not by begging and bitching to be added to one of many blog roll-ups that exist around the community.

Additionally, I am tired of the attitude that everyone deserves a fair chance or that everyone is equal. Guess what. We're not. You know why I have traffic on this blog? It's because my writing is entertaining and because I am a fucking genius. If people aren't reading your stuff then it isn't because you're doing anything wrong. It's because you aren't as fucking good as I am or probably anyone else in the gigantic clusterfuck that is now the list of Eve blogs. Stop listening to all the stupid politically correct bullshit you got fed in kindergarten and when they stopped letting you play dodgeball so that no ones feelings would be hurt and realize that sometimes you're just not good enough. If the only way you can feel good about your life is to see higher traffic numbers on your internet-video-game-blog-that-means-nothing then perhaps it is time to seriously consider suicide, because it sounds like your life is going nowhere.


Monday, February 22, 2010


I spent most of the past couple of months training towards Minimitar cruisers. The main goal of this was to eventually step into a Vagabond. Unfortunately (or fortunately?) before I could finish the final skill of Minimitar Cruiser V, I was made aware of the fact that the Cynabal basically is a Vagabond. Only awesomer.

Sweet Cynabal Jimmy!

Despite any functional/practical reasons as to why the Cynabal is a better ship, there is one superficial factor that plays most significantly into my preference over the Vagabond - the Cynabal looks awesome. At some angles I think it looks like a badass dude on a jetpack:

At other times it looks like some sort of super radioactive killer sea slug:

...and Andrea Skye says that it looks like a Volkswagen Beetle:

I think Skye is retarded. Regardless, he gave me this fit and so far it has worked extremely well:
[Cynabal, Badassery]
Nanofiber Internal Structure II
Nanofiber Internal Structure II
Gyrostabilizer II
Gyrostabilizer II
Tracking Enhancer II

Y-T8 Overcharged Hydrocarbon I Microwarpdrive
Stasis Webifier II
Shadow Serpentis Warp Disruptor
Large Shield Extender II
Large Shield Extender II

425mm AutoCannon II, Barrage M
425mm AutoCannon II, Barrage M
425mm AutoCannon II, Barrage M
425mm AutoCannon II, Barrage M
Medium Unstable Power Fluctuator I

Medium Anti-EM Screen Reinforcer I
Medium Core Defence Field Extender I
Medium Core Defence Field Extender I

Valkyrie II x5

Saturday, February 20, 2010


I spot a missioning Caracal on scan and invite him to a fleet. After a couple attempts, he accepts:
[12:33:56] Spectre3353 > o/
[12:33:59] sw mikolaj > hi
[12:34:12] Spectre3353 > can you accept the invite so i can fix my overview? will only take a second
[12:34:16] Spectre3353 > i need to be in a fleet
[12:34:22] sw mikolaj > ok
[12:34:34] Spectre3353 > thx 1 sec
[12:34:40] Spectre3353 > stupid game is so buggy XD
[12:35:19] sw mikolaj > :)
I warp to the Caracal and enter his mission gate. I keep up the bullshit as long as I can so he doesn't spook and warp away:
[12:36:01] sw mikolaj > what ya doing here ?
[12:36:05] Spectre3353 > fixing overview
[12:36:05] sw mikolaj > missions mining ?
[12:36:06] sw mikolaj > pvp ?
[12:36:08] Spectre3353 > need fleet members on overview
[12:36:11] Spectre3353 > nah overview
[12:36:14] Spectre3353 > ill leave in a sec
[12:36:24] Spectre3353 > this a mission?
[12:36:24] sw mikolaj > make deflaut overview
[12:36:29] Spectre3353 > nah i need to make new tabs
[12:36:31] Spectre3353 > more than just 1
I slowboat 50 kilometers until I am in range to point and engage:
[12:37:29] sw mikolaj > can shoot within one fleet ??
[12:38:28] sw mikolaj > stop shooting at me what's wrong ??
The Caracal explodes:
[12:39:54] Spectre3353 > ok, overview is fixed
[12:39:56] Spectre3353 > thanks for your help!
[12:40:02] sw mikolaj > pfffff
[12:40:15] sw mikolaj > pay me for carcal
[12:40:28] Spectre3353 > pay me for the pleasure of my company
[12:40:56] sw mikolaj > pay me for carcal
[12:41:04] Spectre3353 > pay me for the entertainment i have provided you
[12:41:22] sw mikolaj > lol what entertaiment ?? it was boring
[12:41:32] Spectre3353 > dont lie, it was good, the best you ever had
[12:42:03] sw mikolaj > every time you speak about overview problems ?
[12:42:13] Spectre3353 > yea i was lying
[12:42:37] sw mikolaj > give me at least 3,4 KK so I can buy new
[12:42:53] Spectre3353 > i feel like somehow youre not understanding what is going on here
I take another bite of my porkroll, egg and cheese:

It tastes good.

Friday, February 19, 2010

The Throne

In response to Mynxee's "What's In Your EVESpace?" post:

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

How Not To FC A Moderate Sized Pirate Gang

A little while back, I wrote a shitty guide about how to act as a fleet commander for a small gang of lowsec outlaws. At the time, I had never FC'd for a moderate to large fight. Well tonight I got my first chance to learn when we assembled what was probably the largest fleet in Python Cartel history...

...and then proceeded to get melted by Gallente faction warfare and its friends. It was a fun fight and we were certainly not out of it until the end when their reinforcements (or was it a 3rd party gang?) arrived. Regardless, that fact still doesn't make me feel any better. I hate losing fights of any significant magnitude when I am FC. I hate being in charge and responsible for anyone other than myself losing a ship. As good of a feeling as it is to help be responsible for a victorious engagement, it is much a much worse feeling when you lose. At least this can be a learning experience:

Three things I need to learn about larger scale fights that I have never had to worry about before...

(1) Specifying A Secondary & Tertiary FC Before The Fighting Starts: I've never really had to worry about this. If the FC goes down, the fight is usually almost over anyhow and you can just call to one other person to take care of FC duties for the end. This time, I was the first target primaried and killed and then our secondary FC was not able to jump in due to server lag. This left me scrambling to find someone on grid and capable to take care of FC duties. This in turn led to an unfair sudden burden on a pilot who wasn't expecting to being calling targets and a degradation of communication in the middle of a fight. These are bad things.

(2) Worrying About Lag & Computer Performance: Again, something we rarely have to worry about thanks to our fights being small. This time we had one pilot whose computer dropped to an almost unplayable framerate, another who could not even jump through the gate until halfway through the fight thanks to lag and other pilots who had trouble loading grid to even start taking part in the engagement. I've never had to worry about whether or not being the group jumping into system for a fight on the gate would be an issue although I've heard about how it is a big factor in 0.0. I guess I have now learned that forty ships plus their drones is enough to make it a problem.

(3) Organizing Large Numbers Of People: I don't even know where to begin with this one. I discovered after the fight that we still had pilots who were AFK or not yet in system so we did not have the firepower I had thought we did. This isn't their fault as they had communicated their situation. It was mine for not calculating it into what sort of fleet and firepower we had. Additionally, voice communications get pretty overloaded with so many people involved. When the numbers go up, so does the amount of crap that the FC has to keep track of it. It is difficult beyond a certain point.

The conclusion is that I have a lot to learn about how to handle fights as a FC for engagements of any magnitude from moderate to large size. It is unfortunate that this education has to come at the expense of my corporation members ships. Perhaps next time we will fare better. If anyone has any advice or suggestions as to how to handle medium to larger scale fleet warfare, I would be happy to listen.

Friday, February 12, 2010

Officer Down! - ADF Operation Alpha

The Spacelane Journal Reporter: Welcome today to a special interview! I have with me the acting commander of the Amamake Defence Force who would like to share the details of their special CONCORD led initiative and some recent operations into the lawless areas of low security space. Good morning, Commander Spectre!

Amamake Defence Force Commander Spectre: Hi.

TSJR: Could you give us an idea of what the Amamake Defence Force is and what purpose it is intended to serve?

Spectre: Well, we are a CONCORD sponsored group that was created to take back parts of lowsec that have been ravaged by massive amounts of violence and destruction. Since every operation needs a starting point, we began with our first operation taking place in and around the system of Amamake.

TSJR: Is Amamake a bad system? I must admit that I have never left our offices in Dodixie...

Spectre: You will never encounter a more wretched hive of scum and villiany.

TSJR: So your goal is to destroy those that cause crime and violence in the system and its region?

Spectre: No. The ADF is a strictly non-violent group. Our officers are specially trained in all manners of non-violent solutions to violent problems. Most are equiped with special electronic warfare equipment that will render any offending ships and their weapons useless until they withdraw from the battlefield.

TSJR: I am told that you brought some recordings with you of how your first operation went? Could we see some of it firsthand?

Spectre: Yes. It must be told that this footage is graphic and disturbing. There are images of violence and we lost many good men...

Narrator: At 0219 New Eden Standard Time, the ADF entered Amamake local and began their operations:

[ 02:20:19 ] Spectre3353 > ATTENTION PILOTS - The Amamke Defense Force is declaring this system to hereby stand down all aggression and violent actions and engagements.
[ 02:20:35 ] Spectre3353 > All attempts to circumvent this order will be met with swift intervention.
[ 02:20:58 ] Spectre3353 > This message has been delivered in accordance with the Amamake Peace Accord of 58177
[ 02:21:18 ] zeabor > doec that include ncp
[ 02:21:22 ] ALTOTHEIX > hmm pirates in accordance with peace accord
[ 02:21:34 ] ALTOTHEIX > smells fishy
[ 02:21:38 ] Phil Throbber > i beleive them
[ 02:21:45 ] Spectre3353 > Please do not concern yourselfs with police matters citizen

Narrator: The ADF set up around the system perimeters and announced their intentions. Watching and waiting for their chance to intervene in any violent engagements that may occur.

[ 02:22:48 ] Spectre3353 > ATTENTION PILOTS - The Amamake Defense Force is declaring the system of Amamake to hereby stand down all aggression and violent actions and engagements.
[ 02:23:34 ] zeabor > so does that mean is some one blows me up they get introble
[ 02:23:39 ] zeabor > if*
[ 02:23:51 ] Spectre3353 > Yes, sir. It does.
[ 02:23:55 ] Andrea Skye > there will be no acts of aggression
[ 02:23:55 ] zeabor > yay
[ 02:24:38 ] zeabor > what about missions dont you need ot kill people then
[ 02:25:29 ] zeabor > watch some one blow me up in like a few minutes
[ 02:25:39 ] Spectre3353 > No sir. If we have anything to do with it, you will be safe.
[ 02:25:43 ] La'reth Mihnan > heh
[ 02:25:44 ] Spectre3353 > This system has been declared non-violent.
[ 02:25:53 ] Spectre3353 > The Amamake Defence Force is here for you.

[ 02:26:01 ] Spectre3353 > We have upgraded this system to high security space.
[ 02:26:04 ] zeabor > omg!!!
[ 02:26:18 ] zeabor > then y does it still say 0.4
[ 02:27:23 ] zeabor > i want to see one of you defenders of amamake where are you
[ 02:27:37 ] Spectre3353 > We are where we need to be, sir.


Narrator: The citizens were excited for the fact that someone was here to defend them. They asked for help and they offered up money to assist in the cause.

[02:28:11 ] Spectre3353 > Please direct all requests for ADF response to the on-duty ADF Commander

[ 02:30:00 ] benjam14 > We should get the donations for making amamake safe
[ 02:30:09 ] zeabor > no i want them
[ 02:30:17 ] Spectre3353 > Yes. Please direct all donations to our Treasurer, Spectre3353.
[ 02:30:17 ] Helicity Boson > we are monitoring your maelstrom class battleship on the pator station
[ 02:30:31 ] zeabor > i want to help make it safe i got expensive battle ship
[ 02:30:46 ] Spectre3353 > Sir, do you have anything in the vehicle we should we aware of?
[ 02:30:51 ] Spectre3353 > I'm going to have to take a look in your cargo for contraband.

Narrator: One of the officers spots several combat ships in one of the asteroid belts and the task force respond immediately with full force.

[ 02:33:10 ] Spectre3353 > Sir in the Stealth Bomber, we are monitoring your whereabouts.
[02:33:16 ] Spectre3353 > Please do not engage in any criminal or violent activities.
[ 02:33:26 ] Spectre3353 > The Amamake Defence Force thanks you kindly.
[ 02:33:39 ] Royboy58 > ok
[ 02:34:13 ] Royboy58 > i didnt know there was a defense force here
[ 02:34:45 ] Andrea Skye > THREAT NUETRALISED
[ 02:34:54 ] ALTOTHEIX > hows top belt looking now?
[ 02:35:05 ] Helicity Boson > All is fine citizen.
[ 02:35:06 ] Railwhore > they need more ecm
[ 02:35:07 ] benjam14 > All clear sir! Safe Mining!
[ 02:35:09 ] ALTOTHEIX > I have a civilian miner
[ 02:35:11 ] IEATCRAYONS > It is Safe now.
[ 02:35:24 ] Spectre3353 > You're welcome citizens. The belt at planet three has been cleansed.
[ 02:35:28 ] Spectre3353 > Have a wonderful day.
[ 02:35:38 ] Royboy58 > wow... peace in ammake
[ 02:35:54 ] Spectre3353 > Get used to it. The ADF is here to stay for the good of all races.

Narrator: Reports of another violent encounter come in. The ADF tries their best to gather information about the attack for further investigation.

[ 02:41:06 ] Phil Throbber > some dude in an angel ship killed me
[ 02:41:08 ] L4zor R0B0T > but it was a casualty of working undercover...
[ 02:41:27 ] Phil Throbber > i think his name was angel crusher?
[ 02:41:46 ] zeabor > ill clear all the belts for you ok so ppl can min in peace
[ 02:41:53 ] Andrea Skye > that threat has been neutralised sir
[ 02:41:54 ] Spectre3353 > Could you please tell me more details Mr Throbber?
[ 02:41:56 ] Spectre3353 > Race? Height?
[ 02:42:03 ] Spectre3353 > What color clothes?
[ 02:42:06 ] zeabor > lol

Narrator: Suddenly, many ships are spotted in the asteroid belt. The officers respond again with full force but are quickly overwhelmed by the opposing combatants.

[ 02:42:44 ] Spectre3353 > Halt! In conjunction with The Amamake Peace Accord of 58177 we, the Amamake Defense Force, demand that you cease your aggressions and retreat from the field of battle immediately!

Narrator: Outlaw ships begin to swarm everywhere.

[ 02:43:27 ] Voody Voodoo > blackbird army
[ 02:43:30 ] Voody Voodoo > looks cool
[ 02:43:30 ] zeabor > im being attacked!!!!
[ 02:43:36 ] Voody Voodoo > just a little useless
[ 02:44:06 ] Helicity Boson > xDDD
[ 02:44:13 ] Feyona > ahaha
[ 02:44:27 ] zeabor > i though i was going to be protected
[ 02:44:27 ] Spectre3353 > OFFICER DOWN!
[ 02:44:29 ] Spectre3353 > OFFICER DOWN!
[ 02:44:30 ] ALTOTHEIX > so hows the ADF holding up? :)
[ 02:44:32 ] Spectre3353 > WE HAVE A CODE 13
[ 02:44:33 ] Helicity Boson > lmfao
[ 02:44:42 ] L4zor R0B0T > CALL FOR BACKUP
[ 02:44:43 ] Wohenmang > WE NEED A MEDIVAC ASAP!!!
[ 02:44:51 ] Railwhore > oh noes the defense force was ass raped by miilitia
[ 02:44:51 ] ALTOTHEIX > lol
[ 02:44:54 ] Sulg > Resuce indys otw
[ 02:44:57 ] Ophey Won > enuff blackbirds i think
[ 02:44:59 ] ALTOTHEIX > epic
[ 02:45:19 ] zeabor > the top belt is not clear again the top belt is not clear
[ 02:45:23 ] ALTOTHEIX > LOL
[ 02:45:26 ] Spectre3353 > CODE 13 CODE 13
[ 02:45:28 ] Spectre3353 > OFFICER DOWN OFFICER DOWN
[ 02:45:37 ] zeabor > code 13?
[ 02:45:38 ] benjam14 > OFFICERS DOWN!!!

[ 2010.02.12 02:45:52 ] ALTOTHEIX > this is highly entertaining

The feed quickly cuts out as a volley of missiles slams into the ADF ship that is recording the action.

TSJR: That was quite intense, Commander. What was the final result of the first ADF operation?

Spectre: *looks away and tries to stay composed before replying* We lost many good officers that day. Some of them were barely more than boys... but rest assured. We will be back. The ADF will be back...


UPDATE: The ADF has declared its intentions on the nets of New Eden. Give your vocal support to their cause!

Thursday, February 11, 2010

It's True

[04:49:21] Spectre3353 > i am a good person
[04:49:26] IEATCRAYONS > lol
[04:49:32] Spectre3353 > NO LAUGHING

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Working Title

I Never Said I Was Quitting Eve

An indefinite break is a very ambiguous term. It could mean three days. It could mean three months. It could mean forever. In this specific case, my break lasted around six to eight weeks. A few days ago I did start actively playing Eve-Online again. Apparently most of these people who saw me online don't understand what the term "indefinite break" means:
[ 15:15:37 ] Laedy > u quitting eve? 

[ 19:48:47 ] Calculon > Weren't you quitting, Spectre?

[ 05:31:08 ] Jaxxon Voers > wtf?
[ 05:31:30 ] Jaxxon Voers > i thought you quit eve to go play Maple Story 

[ 20:10:47 ] Avan Sercedos > spectre I thought you quit

[ 20:13:09 ] Lila Morgan > Spectre

[ 20:13:13 ] Lila Morgan > thought you quit 

[ 03:09:28 ] Baeryn > Spec, I hear you're quitting EVE

[ 03:09:43 ] Baeryn > Me an' Mynx will split your stuff 50/50

[ 03:09:51 ] Spectre3353 > im not quitting nothing 

[ 03:16:53 ] Ragnar Remis > hey spect

[ 03:16:59 ] Spectre3353 > dont 
[ 03:17:00 ] Spectre3353 > dont say it

[ 03:17:10 ] Spectre3353 > if i hear it one more fucking time im going to kill someone 
[ 03:17:20 ] Kyle Langdon > i heard you were quitting

[ 03:29:45 ] Spectre3353 > you guys remember the first time i quit eve

[ 03:29:52 ] Spectre3353 > and then i started playing again 2 days later 
[ 03:29:54 ] Lana Torrin > why do i get the feeling i have missed something important...

[ 02:26:45 ] 00sage00 > wtf spectre is back

[ 02:27:24 ] Jorshan > wasn't he quitting eve or something? 
[ 02:35:16 ] Casiella Truza > Dude needed an ego stroke, evidently ;)
I hate you all.

Minmitar Ships

While I was inactivate, I left my toon training towards Tech II Medium Projectile weapons and Minimitar cruisers. While I still have a couple weeks left to finish Minmitar Cruiser V, I have completed the weapons training and have purchased several Minnie ships including the Rupture, Stabber and Hurricane. My first tries at fitting them:

For the Rupture, I wasn't sure whether to fit falloff rigs or trimarks but since tracking enhancers are so buff these days, I opted for the trimarks:
[Rupture, Tank]
Damage Control II
1600mm Reinforced Rolled Tungsten Plates I
Tracking Enhancer II
Gyrostabilizer II
Gyrostabilizer II

10MN MicroWarpdrive I
J5b Phased Prototype Warp Scrambler I
Stasis Webifier II

Small Unstable Power Fluctuator I
Small Diminishing Power System Drain I
220mm Vulcan AutoCannon II, Barrage M
220mm Vulcan AutoCannon II, Barrage M
220mm Vulcan AutoCannon II, Barrage M
220mm Vulcan AutoCannon II, Barrage M

Medium Trimark Armor Pump I
Medium Trimark Armor Pump I
Medium Trimark Armor Pump I

Warrior II x4
Valkyrie II x1
For the Stabber, I can't help but laugh every single time I look at it. Which fucking game designer at Eve decided that any ship should roll with ONE light drone? Give it no drones. Give it two. But one light drone on a cruiser? Why even bother? Anyhow, I went with a pretty standard fit although I am kind of wishing I had fit falloff rigs here as well instead of rigs that barely buff an already thin shield tank:
[Stabber, Nano]
Tracking Enhancer II
Gyrostabilizer II
Nanofiber Internal Structure II

10MN MicroWarpdrive I
Warp Disruptor II
Large Shield Extender II

220mm Vulcan AutoCannon II, Republic Fleet Fusion M
220mm Vulcan AutoCannon II, Republic Fleet Fusion M
220mm Vulcan AutoCannon II, Republic Fleet Fusion M
220mm Vulcan AutoCannon II, Republic Fleet Fusion M
50W Infectious Power System Malfunction
Small Diminishing Power System Drain I

Medium Anti-EM Screen Reinforcer I
Medium Core Defence Field Extender I
Medium Core Defence Field Extender I

Warrior II x1
Lastly, we have the ship that I am really excited about. Battlecruisers are one of my favorite ship classes and I now have access to at least competently fly all except the Drake. I bought two Hurricanes to try out, one as a nano-speed ship and the other as a plated-tanked ship:
[Hurricane, Nano]
Damage Control II
Tracking Enhancer II
Gyrostabilizer II
Gyrostabilizer II
Nanofiber Internal Structure II
Nanofiber Internal Structure II

10MN MicroWarpdrive I
Warp Disruptor II
Large Shield Extender II
Large Shield Extender II

425mm AutoCannon II, Republic Fleet EMP M
425mm AutoCannon II, Republic Fleet EMP M
425mm AutoCannon II, Republic Fleet EMP M
425mm AutoCannon II, Republic Fleet EMP M
425mm AutoCannon II, Republic Fleet EMP M
425mm AutoCannon II, Republic Fleet EMP M
50W Infectious Power System Malfunction
50W Infectious Power System Malfunction

Medium Anti-EM Screen Reinforcer I
Medium Core Defence Field Extender I
Medium Core Defence Field Extender I

Warrior II x6

[Hurricane, Tank]
Damage Control II
1600mm Reinforced Rolled Tungsten Plates I
Energized Adaptive Nano Membrane II
Tracking Enhancer II
Gyrostabilizer II
Gyrostabilizer II

10MN MicroWarpdrive I
Warp Disruptor II
Stasis Webifier II
Medium Electrochemical Capacitor Booster I, Cap Booster 800

425mm AutoCannon II, Arch Angel Fusion M
425mm AutoCannon II, Arch Angel Fusion M
425mm AutoCannon II, Arch Angel Fusion M
425mm AutoCannon II, Arch Angel Fusion M
425mm AutoCannon II, Arch Angel Fusion M
425mm AutoCannon II, Arch Angel Fusion M
Small Unstable Power Fluctuator I
Small Unstable Power Fluctuator I

Medium Trimark Armor Pump I
Medium Trimark Armor Pump I
Medium Trimark Armor Pump I

Warrior II x4
Valkyrie II x1
I have not gotten a chance to fly these ships much yet but so far I like them. I even pulled a Python(tm) on someone today and managed to try out the Stabber in a T1 cruiser fight to the death. It was fun but for some reason afterward, my opponent yelled at me in local chat:
[18:25:27] Spectre3353 > shlen?
[18:25:33] shlen > сек
[18:27:06] shlen > what do tou want?
[18:27:24] Spectre3353 > just to talk
[18:27:27] Spectre3353 > how has your day been?
[18:31:37] Spectre3353 > gf
[18:31:49] shlen > пидорас
[18:32:39] shlen > whore)))

[18:33:32] shlen > буржуи вы пидоры хлеще чем все остальные))))
[18:34:03] shlen > Spectre3353 это тебя шлюха касается
[18:34:40] shlen > Spectre3353 че притих говнодав
[18:35:12] Spectre3353 > does anyone know what he is saying
[18:35:18] Spectre3353 > babelfish translations dont really work too well
[18:35:22] CpHarding > nope
[18:36:33] shlen > пидор какой нахуй транслейтет ))))) шлюха как ебли вас так и будем
[18:36:44] RedHairedDude > ban?
[18:38:34] shlen > я те в жбан ща ебну бан ему блять козлина ебаная! ебло офф сделай дырка
[18:40:06] shlen > ладно хуесосы буржуйные будет время вас еще выебать
[18:40:54] LLIycmpuk > ыыы
I'm not honestly sure what any of that means but based on his gestures and demeanor I believe he was thanking me for relieving him of his ship and it's contents and then inviting me for tea tomorrow. If anyone knows Russian, please feel free to clue me in on exactly what all that text translates to and what time the tea is occurring. Thanks!

It's Cold Outside

I Don't Think We're Getting Mail Today

Generating Some Yellow Snow

There Was A Street There Yesterday...

A Good Day For Indoors Internet Spaceships

Saturday, February 6, 2010

The Python Cartel Wants You!

That's right. The best pirate corp in New Eden is opening recruitment and looking for several new pilots. You must be a talented and driven individual that loves discussion about genitalia almost as much as they like getting themselves blown up.

What we offer:

* No hassle, no bullshit. We log on, we shoot at stuff, we get shot and then we talk about which side our junk is hanging to that day. There are no politics, we have basically no blues and we have very few restrictions as to how you can play. Our #1 goal and rule is to have fun.

* Killboard, forums, Ventrilo, ship insurance program, scheduled roams/ops several times a week and more! We have the tools both in and out of game to help make your pirating experience complete.

* Flying with the most entertaining group of pilots you will ever meet. Even the ops where you get slaughtered, podded and lose everything you ever owned will be fun.

* Fame. This blog gets over 250,000,000 hits a day and as a part of the Python Cartel, you and your exploits will be displayed for all on the internet to see! (NOTE: All site traffic statistics are approximate and may be slightly inaccurate)

But enough of my opinion. Here are some testimonials from current members:
Spectre: hey
Spectre: can you do something for me
Spectre: really quick right now off the top of your head
Helicity: >.>
Spectre: come up with some sort of ridiculous quote about pc
Spectre: think of it as like
Spectre: if you were in an infomercial and someone was like WOW TELL US HOW AWESOME THIS PRODUCT IS
Spectre: but its about your corp
Spectre: ok ready, set, GO
Helicity: euh
Helicity: We don't suck as much as the other corps, and we take better care of your penis than FW.
Helicity: Python, for a happier, healthier penis.
Spectre: it seems like youre going really penis centric with this
Spectre: i think thats ok though, ill take it
Spectre: the quotes i mean, not your penis
Wow! How convincing! Let's ask the Python Cartel CEO himself how he feels as well:
Spectre: i need a quote
Spectre: about why people would want to join pc
Spectre: give me one right now
Spectre: off the top of your head
Spectre: make it good
Golden Helmet: "I heard you guys were good"
Spectre: thats terrible
Spectre: try again
Golden Helmet: "More manlove than a gay nightclub in San Francisco"?
Spectre: getting warmer
Spectre: give me one more and make it your best
Spectre: and youll be done
Golden Helmet: "PEEEEEEENIS!"
Spectre: ...
Spectre: ok cool
Golden Helmet: you knew it was coming
Spectre: this is going in my blog for a recruitment post for PC
Spectre: just letting you know
Golden Helmet: oh god
So if you want to be part of the best pirate corporation in Eve that has already taken part in over 12,000 kills and is pretty much obsessed with the word "PENIS", visit our recruitment forums today!

Friday, February 5, 2010

A Geometric Element That Has Position But No Extension

It was quiet. We floated silently in a small group and stared off at the Tama system star, billions of kilometers away. I took another sip of my drink and wondered again why I was here. Since the end of the previous year I had only taken part in a couple of kills and had barely even undocked to fly with my corporation or engage in a fight. The motivation to pirate had waned as of late... what was the point? Undock. Kill some ships. Lose some ships. Dock back up. Repeat. Money was no longer something that was a concern and the joy of combat seems to dry up once you've been through your thousandth encouter.

I took another sip. My head felt woozy and I began to consider simply turning off the comms and docking up without saying anything. I don't know why I was here. What was the point?

Golden Helmet said something about flying to another system and I complied with his orders but I was barely listening. I jumped in and went to the next gate. I took another sip and yawned. What was the point?

I jumped in and set course for the belt that was being specified by our fleet commander. I watched as my gang aligned and warped in the same direction, without any specific coordination. I wonder what we were going after? I wonder if I'll be able to aim my guns properly after drinking so much? I wonder, what is the point?

As I deccelerated out of warp, the serene feeling melted away and several explosions close by grabbed my attention. Our gang had just dropped in on our old friends The Guristas Associates. Apparently they had requested our help and we were arriving to provide it. Perhaps I should have paid closer attention to what we were doing and I would have realized we were flying here. To this belt. To kill a carrier. I turned on my lasers. I turned on my warp disruptor. I couldn't help but crack a grin as I realized... I had a point.


- The Python Cartel/The Jerk Cartel portal, killboard and forums have all been brought up to date with a new snazzy look and updated information.

- did an article with Helicity Boson and he was nice enough to link me. Thanks Helicity!

- My last post was the 200th entry on this blog. Congratulations to me!